February 22, 2012

The Progressive American Report - Get On PAR!

We are Progressives because we understand the complexity of the many problems that face our country, our world and its people...and we care about moving America forward.  But, let's face it, not everyone understands complex issues. So, how do we reach those people?

Comment with your ideas. I promise to consider and reply to all of them. ;-)

February 17, 2012

Why Christians (and therefore the GOP) Hate Women

I've figured it out. It all makes sense. I now understand why Christians and the GOP hate women. It's a long and preposterous story so, let's get started.

Let's take a look at this issue through their eyes.

In the Beginning

In the Bible, God created man and animals and everything was going great. Adam had the ultimate man-cave, the Garden of Eden, to hang out in - unlimited fishing, bear wrestling, ball scratching...all the great stuff about life.

But after a while, God noticed that Adam was spending WAY more time on ball scratching than necessary & when the light was just right, his eyes were lingering a little too long on the Beaver.  So, God created woman.  She was beautiful and alluring and Adam couldn't stop thinking about her naughty parts.

But, then Eve got hungry and Adam told her he wanted to watch football and didn't feel like going out. Just find something to eat here, he told her. Fine, Eve found something to eat but, then Adam started yelling from the couch that if she was making herself something she could bring a sandwich or something for him. So, she did.

Well, apparently, they had gotten into God's secret stash of Oreos or something and He wasn't happy about it. Not happy at all. In fact, He was so unhappy that he kicked Adam and Eve right out of the ultimate man-cave.

But, that wasn't all. God - knowing how much everyone enjoyed Eve's naughty parts - also put a "curse" on them that made them frightening and confusing for Adam but, yet, he still couldn't stop thinking about them.

So. The first reason Christians hate women is because Woman got Man thrown out of the ultimate man-cave when she pissed off God for eating His cookies...or as the Church labels it - created SIN. [remember that for later]

The second reason is because those naughty parts of ours are confusing and frightening to men yet, they cannot stop thinking about them...and that confuses and frightens them.